CROWN OF GREY

when I was a little girl

I wanted to be a Barbie doll

didn't we all?

Over the years, I grew into a 1970 full fledged bell-bottomed, halter-topped

hipster hippie chick who never wanted to get married, have kids, eat meat, do drugs,

drink or smoke or do one single fake thing

E.V.E.R.

quite the contrast from the Barbie doll phase

as I got older I imagined that some day I

M.I.G.H.T.

consider

coloring my hair and maybe doing a little something to my wrinkling face

when the time and budget allowed

and then

I turned 55

 I reverted back to my 1970 self with my hipster 15 year old hippie chick mentality

(with the exception of  3 kids+ steak on the grill often+wine OFTEN)

I promised myself

no dying or cutting of hair

no cutting of face or neck

this is when I realized the ones I admired the most

had crowns of grey

my very great grandmother's hair was always in a bun

but I sometimes sat at her dressing table and watched as she let it down and 

brushed it with her horned soft bristle brush

it was to the small of her back...silver and wavy

my mother turned 82 this December...her hair turned grey many years ago and it is very long also

I'm not sure what gave me the peace to just

 let it be

to just let things be and occur as they would and will

but I have that peace

for my daughters, I want to be the kind of mother that doesn't try too hard 

to hang on to fleeting beauty because it will part...no matter what I do

and what better example is this little beauty...I have a feeling that this is exactly what Betty 

will look like when she's 92 

I delight to wonder 

what things in her life will turn her hair the most glorious color of grey

as my grandmother told me all of her life

beauty

is what you are on the inside