Tuesday, August 17, 2010

THAT'S RIGHT ICE MAN...I'M DANGEROUS

Ok.

Nearly 20 years have come and gone and I think I can finally (face) tell the truth.

My cable was cut off due to non-payment.

I told my children and the world that I chose to not have cable because I was tired of my developing brains being bombarded with trash.

The truth is..I really was…but the other truth is that when they came and turned it off it was rather obvious that we could not afford cable and ok…sometimes gas and water.

Instead of being honest, I was an enabler.

And the person that I enabled has been gone somewhere else for a long enough time that he might even find this funny. And I am no longer an enabler with secrets to keep. In fact…I used cable as a bribe for them to live with me…so that falls under some other kind of unacceptable category…like manipulation.

But for 4 years, we had no television except for movies.

My son never knew who OJ Simpson was or that he killed his wife and then led the police on a chase in his white Ford Bronco…but he could recite from memory practically every word from Top Gun because he watched it 4598 times. And this same talent is quite extraordinary when you consider that Lonesome Dove is almost 13 hours long.

I am not angry anymore that we had no air conditioner for 2 years, cable for 4 years, and intermittent episodes of sudden power outages. And I must admit that I kind of admire a person who can golf right after lunch every single day and never let the mundane things of life get in the way of which club to use when the breeze is out of the north.

And I do find it very funny when out of the clear blue sky, my now 26 year old (with a very developed brain I might add)…quips to me….Ace...Ven..tura…Pet.. De..tec..tive.

And that I am able to reply "What do you know about Ray Finkle?"

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