Thursday, October 6, 2011

MOMMY ISSUES



I can remember when I was in ninth grade that horrible awful feeling of my P.E. clothes tumbling in the dryer at 8 AM on Monday morning.

Then:  Good grief mother of mine who cares so little about me that you can't even get my P.E. clothes washed in decent time.  Do you not think it's embarrassing enough that I am in P.E. in the first place?  Are you really THAT busy that I am forced to wear damp P.E. clothes in 3rd period?

10 Years Later: Mom, I realize you had 5 kids and given the fact that we all had the same black glasses that made us look like Clark Kent, I would assume we all had P.E. clothes tumbling in the dryer at 8 AM on Monday morning.  So...it wasn't just bad form toward me....we all suffered through it and made it just fine.

Now:  Good grief you twit and spoiled rotten brat!  You were in the ninth grade and your mother was doing your laundry?  And there were five kids and you weren't helping out better than that?  And you really cared if you were in P.E.?

Dear Mommy,
Thank you for doing my P.E. clothes all the times you did them.  And thank you for letting me get contacts so I didn't have to look just like my brothers.

Mommy issue solved.

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